sometimes simple is best

For the past few weeks, I've had this really challenging question weighing on my mind, and on my heart...trying to decide if I was satisfied with the direction and future of a relationship that means a great deal to me...trying to decide if what exists in the relationship is enough for me. As frustrating as this has been, I had this ridiculous compulsion to keep turning the scenario over and over in my head like a rock tumbler churns rocks, believing that if I just let it tumble long enough, a solution would come out smooth and polished. Only problem? It wasn't working...at all. No matter what reasonable arguments I thought up, no matter what logical explanations I developed, I couldn't let go of this question. And honestly? It was driving me a little crazy.

Then this afternoon, I was browsing around in the blog world, and found this amazing wisdom:

"When we place our expectations on others,

we are denying them who they truly are.

As such, can we ever say we truly know or accept a person

if we do not allow them the freedom to be themselves?"

"We miss out on the life that is taking place

and we miss out on the true nature

of the people with whom we interact."

As soon as I read these thoughts, this little voice in my heart said, "Hello?! Paying attention??" And I finally realized, after weeks of frustrated and complicated contemplation, how simple the answer really is. Either I can spend my time building false hopes and creating unrealistic expectations that will only lead to disappointment, or I can enjoy this relationship for what it is - a beautiful part of my life that brings me so much happiness and comfort. Because otherwise, I might spend so much time imagining what this relationship could be that I miss out on what it is, right now in this moment. When I look at it that way, all the what-if's just don't seem to matter.

Amazing how easily the answers arrive, if only I stop looking so hard.

Where I am: Home