Flat shoe + good aim = dead spider

I hate spiders...no matter how big or small they are, they give me the creeps. I even have trouble looking at them through inches of glass at the aquarium. So finding one in my house...not cool, at all! You would think they'd learn after a while not to come into my house. I mean, when Aunt Sue or Grandpa Joe don't come back to the web after a jaunt over to my place, shouldn't that be a warning to the rest of them to stay the heck out?! In the past few days, I've been averaging a spider a day, and that's just too many.

So spiders beware - I have excellent aim, and a flip-flop with a flat bottom perfectly designed to squash your little butts (and the rest of your little eight-legged bodies) all over my wall if I see you. Unless you want to start paying rent...then I might consider a truce.

Actually, no...it'd probably be better if you just stayed out altogether.

Where I am: Home, on my lunch break
What I'm reading: The Taking by Dean Koontz (the best author ever!)

(Alright, this is getting ridiculous! As I was sitting here publishing this post, one ran across the arm of my couch. Lucky for him my flip-flop was across the room. Darn things - don't they know when they're not welcome?!)

(But he had to press his luck...as I was finishing up lunch, I looked up and there was that darn spider on my coffee table. Unlucky for him, I happened to have a book in my hand, which makes just as good a weapon as a flip-flop. A moment of silence, please, for our recently-departed friend...)

Comments

Adri said…
Living in the south, I had all kinds of good bug stories to share... fortunately no spiders... only cochroaches.

One of my college roomates killed a cochroach that crawled out from behind her bed with one of my heavy, thick platform-heeled shoes. She runs into my room, "Quick! Quick! Give me your heaviest shoe!", takes the shoe, I hear a heavy twack/thump, and she returns my shoe to me. She didn't dare throw the shoe in the on-campus apartment!

Another time, one crawled out from between sheets of yellow trace on my desk in the fifth floor architecture studio. I decided that I had other places I'd rather be and left, throughly spooked at finding it there.

Good thing you have good aim!
snowdogssd said…
You're such a goofball. :) Here you are, a thousand times bigger than that tiny little thing, and you freak out. :)
I have to agree with adri though. Coachroaches are by far worse. Those little buggers can carry nasty diseases. Plus they spread like crazy. You ought to see the ones I had to put up with in Hawaii. Big ol bastards.
Just think, if you have a spider in the house, you won't have flies. :)

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